Erica Martino

My child is constantly misbehaving and I cannot deal with it anymore!

My husband and I have this phrase we often like to use “Where is the handbook?” Seriously these precious little beings coming into our world. They have a mind of their own, their own personality and no one bothered to send a manual with them! I mean how nice would it be to turn to page 5 and read about

“When my child constantly wants to miss school do this.”

Instead we get to figure it out on our own.

Steps to behavior modification

1. Find the source of the problem. How is your child winning by the way they are choosing to act?

Maybe it’s the only time they get your attention?

Do they get their favorite treat when they act up?

Do they get to sleep in if they choice not to get up in the morning?

2. Create a rewards/ punishment system

Children between the ages of 3 and 12 need very specific steps.

Create a reward and punishment

Make sure to follow through

Need an example?

Susie is not getting up in the morning. A few changes have recently happened in the home. The most recent in the addition of Susie’s little sister Aubrey. Mom and dad are busy attending to the new baby. Susie has realized that if she puts up a fuss in the morning and refuses to get out of bed, she misses the bus, therefore her father has to take her to school. Susie has learned that by missing the bus she gets alone time with daddy. Her dysfunction is serving a function.

(Its important that Susie learns she can get alone time with mom and dad without missing school so set up date nights or one on one time with her)

To get her to school:

1. Make expectations clear. Susie you have to be up at 6:30 a.m. dressed and downstairs by 7:00 a.m. and ready to be on the bus at 7:30 a.m. with coats and mittens on. If she meets those goals she gets a reward. It has to be a reward that she really wants.
2. If she fails to meet the expectations, then she loses the reward or has to give it to someone else.
3. Don’t give up

Behaviors do not change overnight. They involve awareness of the problem and consistency.

Try a behavior modification and see if it works! If you have questions just ask!

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